So our WHOLE30 adventure continues. I’m embarrassed to admit that it only took 2 days to reveal some rather ugly aspects of my character. I woke up to the baby crying and fantasies of chemical-laced coffee creamer and artificial sweetener. So I “generously” offered to let Hubs sleep in while I got up to take care of our baby. Even as I prepped her bottle, I knew what I was going to do and planned to very quietly retrieve the sweeteners out of the corner of the pantry where I’d hidden them just days before.
A few minutes later, Baby Girl changed, fed, burped and happy, I sprung into action. I brewed up my coffee and stirred in that delicious white “creamer” powder full of mystery and unpronounceable chemicals. Yum! I paused. “Hmm, better at least try to use fewer packets of sweetener. I’ll go with half.” I then experienced momentary guilt for cheating on our commitment, but I tell myself Hubs will understand. Didn’t he describe black coffee with no creamer and no sweetener as “like drinking a cup of fresh brewed hatred”? Yeah, he’d understand. Besides, he won’t know.
I’d just sat and taken my first sip when Hubs came out of the bedroom. He took one look at my cup and launched into a lecture about all the reasons we chose to do the WHOLE30; how we want to be healthier for our daughter; how the current discomfort is only temporary and will result in long term benefits. He reminded me of all the things we had discussed before we decided to take this journey. And I felt guilty. But I also felt uncertain. Perhaps I was never really committed to this process; otherwise I would not have kept those items so readily accessible. This reminded me of the scripture below. As a result of this lesson, I’ve had to rethink my commitment. I’ve also realized that we need to be willing to totally dispense with those items or habits we wish to get rid of. It’s not enough to kind of commit to stopping while still permitting easy access to those things, while still keeping them around. Too bad for me it took a little shaming to learn that lesson.
“…and make no provision for the flesh in regard to its lusts.”
~Romans 13:14 (NASB)
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WHOLE30 Meal of the Day (dinner)
Simple Roasted Chicken with Caribbean Roasted Root Veggies & Salad